Monday, September 12, 2005

Overwhelmed by Shoes?

Just go all out. This may be the funnest shoe season in thrity-seven years. Watchwords: unusual, Italian, uncomfortable. "If it doesn't hurt, you're not trying hard enough."*

*Translated from the French.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want to pack one pair of shoes that can walk, dance and knock out. Any suggestions?

9:00 PM  
Blogger Jeepers said...

We're trying to picture a scenario that would involve all three--walking, dancing, and knocking out--and we just can't. Is there any way you could carry a tote bag for extra shoes, then slip on a new pair between activities? If not, then wear slightly pointy (but not too!) ballet flats that show a lot of toe clevage. Use your eyes for knocking out.

9:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Jeepers,

If a person wears those shoes with six-inch-long pointy toe boxes, will one's toes end up similarly deformed? I will say those shoes are great for smashing spiders and cockroaches that try to find safety in corners! Also, is there an inverse ratio between a shoe's comfort and its price? If so, why?
--"Confused by Fashion"

12:14 AM  
Blogger Jeepers said...

Dear Confused by Fashion,
Your question reminds me of complaints against contemporary art being too clever, foreigners talking too fast in their native languages, and seat belts being uncomfortable. Do you care about beauty, or don't you?
Anyhow, we are in no way endorsing Wicked Witch of the West pointy shoes. And no, your toes have just as much room as in rounded-toe shoes: the point is an extension BEYOND your toes.
Expensive shoes are sometimes uncomfortable because they are designed by artistes, not podiatrists.
Bless your heart, do you have cockroaches? We don't. We live in a spotless apartment with windows on three sides. Sometimes, however, we have mouse visitors, who nibble on crumbs in corners and scamper playfully in the cabinets and stove. Our two, large white Persian cats delight in their visits.

11:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jeepers, I don't believe you. Don't you live in NYC?

8:06 PM  

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