The Envelope(s) Please

After sifting through the nearly dozens of brilliant entries into our Fashion-Related Constitutional Law Analogy Contest, we have selected the winners. Unfortunately, both have offered analogies that strain our drawing abilities, so you'll have to wait a bit to see the pictorial representation of their grand ideas. (Plus, tomorrow is cartoon meeting day at The New Yorker, and we have zero toons completed.)

So, until we draw up the winners' ideas, suffice it to say that the hilarious Walt came up with a succinct and absurd analogy, while his co-winner, David Marc Fischer, offered a less succint, but equally apt and cogent, parable of injustice. Congrats, you two! (Old Hag, darling, and my dearest Shannon, you will always be first in my heart, even at your most confusing and irrelevant. Lauren C. of Lux Lotus, you've cast me into dispair, because I was still trying to convince myself that maybe short-sleeved jackets could maybe be a good idea, under some circumstances. Like, at a board meeting where the air-conditioner is on the fritz? Or, for the inauguration of a Bermudian president? But I guess not.)